The Pursuit Of Happiness

One day I was setting and wondering about happiness. I was questioning myself, where and how does it come from? Is it really so hard to be happy irrespective of what is happening in our life? Well, if you think, you will realize that its not that difficult. We are the one who control our own outlook on life. No matter how noisy and fraught time is, doom and gloom do not control our lives, unless we permit them to. We can be happy in the very little things of life, But we choose not to. Always remember every situation have two sides – good & bad. No matter how bad the circumstances may appear to be, there is always a way around. When things gets tough, face the adversities with a smile. Accept that life is rough and you have no choice but to deal with it head-on.


Be comfortable with who are you: Accept you flaws with the ease with which you accept your good qualities, No one is perfect. No matter how amazing a certain person may seem, he has his own flaws. Never beat yourself down by obsessing over your short-comings. Instead imagine the person you want to be, think about ideal version of yourself – physically, emotionally, professionally and personally. Once you have that picture in mind, start making the decisions and choices that you think are best for you.

Stop chasing and start living: Many of us keeps thinking, once I have this I will become happier. We keep chasing for more money, fashionable clothes, better relationships to make our-self happy. Instead of enjoying life, we chase a obscure idea of happiness.Wanting more is fine, but don’t forget to relax and enjoy life for what it is – in the present.

Don't make anyone in-charge of your happiness: We often blame other people, circumstances and even objects for our problems. Instead of blaming others for what’s wrong in your life, focus on what you can do to make things better. It’s your responsibility to make yourself happy: nobody else’s. Most of the time, we make somebody else in-charge of our happiness. If we want to do something, we look for other people company, for example, if we feel like watching a movie, we will wait for friends to get available. If we want to wear a dress, we will not wear it if somebody tells us that we look fat in it. Never do this, in the act of keeping our-self happy, we should stop thinking, what others will think and say. Do whatever makes you feel good. Don't try to reason it out with people!

Start taking actions: If you want something, go get it. Without you actions there will be no reaction. Nothing is going to change. If you want to learn guitar, grab a guitar in you hand and start learning, If you want to loss weight, start jogging, Not happy with you job, start looking for a change. You have to do something to change the situations around you.

Stop Expecting: The problem with all of us is that we never stop expecting. Expectation lead to disappointment and disappointment leads to unhappiness. Accept life in its entirety; stop thinking in terms of what should be and accept what is. When you live without entitlement, every good thing becomes a wonderful surprise. Expecting nothing means never being disappointed. Sometimes we expect way too much from our-self, and sometimes we feel burdened from others' expectations. Till the time, it is making you rise up and grow in life, it is fine. But, don't let it bring you down.

Stay away from negative people. People will try to bring you down, pull yourself so high that you become beyond their reach. Improve yourself, find time for things that make you happy, and people that matter. Staying happy is not difficult. You just have to make a genuine attempt at it and happiness will follow you..

Stop complaining. Be positive.

We all know that we should always think positively. When we’re feeling good, it takes no trouble to think and say - “Hey,  Things are going great. My life is cool.”

But what happen when things are not as good as we expected? What about when we’re so stressed? What when we hate our job, we loss someone? What about days when we are facing a series of unfortunate events that makes you feel like hell?

Well there is so much we can do. I've meet people who remain cheerful and lively during really bad time. They always had "life is still beautiful" attitude when things are falling apart. And to be honest after looking at them and knowing them, I feel like slapping myself. They made me realize that - I am not the only one who had bad time, there are people who have much bigger problems than I have, still they face it with great courage and positive attitude.

Once I was travelling from Cochin to Bangalore. I was at airport waiting for departure. Suddenly a old aged couple came and sat next to me. They were very friendly and there was a lovely smile on their face. They started talking to me..They thought I am a local guy, so they were speaking in their local language Malayalam with me. I was not getting any clue that whats going on and what are they saying. When they came to know I don't understand Malayalam, they started laughing.. and said - 'oh.. we are so sorry we thought you are a local guy.. now we have to speak all again for you in English'. We all were laughing. During the conversation I came to know that they have lost their younger son just few days ago. I was like.. 'Oh what to say now'. I was wondering how can someone remains so calm and positive after facing such a big tragedy. That day I looked at myself and asked.. Is my problem and pain, more than what they are facing? They have lost their son, still they have a positive attitude toward life. They had accepted what they can't change and moved on. All my way to Bangalore I was thinking of them.. I was thankful to god that I came across that couple because they gave me courage to let go of what I can't change. They taught me one thing that day... embrace the moment, whether it contains an obstacle or an opportunity, stop complaining over trivial matters and start focusing on what’s really important to you. There is no point waiting and thinking about things we can't changed.

We all complain about things.. we have a list of everything that makes us miserable.. She/He did wrong to me.. my job sucks.. my boss is an ass..I hate waking up in morning.. my girlfriend is cheating on me.. my roommate is a jerk.. blah blah blah.. We complain at work. We complain at home. But what's the purpose of complaining? All of us should accept that we all have a great life, we are sitting in air conditioned rooms, sitting in front of computer screen, surfing on net (may be in office hours). The life we all are living today, is a dream of many people. So appreciate what you have and stop complaining about things.

But sometimes in life we complain about relationships specially with deep emotional involvement. Remember that people come into our lives and go. Some of them stay forever and some stays just for a while, leaves footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same. Their presence and their departure from our life provide us an opportunity to grow and re-evaluate our life. The people we've shared such deep connections are teachers, and the lessons they leave are a gift. Relationships that do not work out are not failures. They are meant to happen to prepare us to become the person we were meant to be. But its us who chooses, how to perceive these experiences, as our happiness is determined by our own choice.

Everything happens for a reason, the universe have a strange way of showing his perfect plans. Bad time is also a part of life. It push us to make active choices that moves us onto a path of positivity.

We never appreciate things we already have. We are healthy, We have a home, job, food, family, friends, cars, legs, arms, eyes. We aren't living on the streets. We have a life and we are spending the majority of it complaining about it. What is wrong with us? There are people who are starving, people who have to beg for food and shelter, people that have lost all of their loved ones, lost limbs, lost everything and still manage to find beauty in the world, appreciate for what little they do have.

We should consider our-self incredibly lucky because we have the ability to change almost everything that we are unhappy with. We should stop over thinking, stop worrying, life is too short for all of that, start living your life today, maybe we won’t get tomorrow.

First Time I Saw the Sea

You never know when and what life gives you. Sometimes you get all you want, but sometimes all you get is lemon. Life takes all good you have. If that happens what should we do? I and a friend of mine who was equally fucked up as I was, decided to do things we always dreamed of doing together. We planned a trip and executed it.

The most exciting thing for me in that trip was - 'seeing the sea'. I had always dreamed of seeing the ocean. As a child, I would watch the clouds gather from the horizon and wonder if they had come from the seacoast.

Our first destination was itself magical GOA!! I reached Thivim, GOA, a small town with full of scenic beauty. As I came out of railway station I knew this place will show me things I have never seen. I took a taxi from there to my hotel. Wow...!! it was raining now.. All my way to hotel I was thinking 'where is the sea!, where is the sea!'. I asked taxi driver also - 'Is there ocean on the way to hotel'? He was noticing me and said 'bhaiya lagta hai kabhi samudra nhi dekha hai aapne..' (Brother I think you have never seen the ocean). I got shocked - 'how did he know..', may be I was so excited that made him guess right. Finally, late after noon I reached hotel, later my friend also joined. We were seeing each other after a long time, that also added to my excitement. :)

Just after reaching hotel I inquired with receptionist, how can we reach the nearest beach. He said Sir, calangute beach is just about 500 mts from hear you can walk there. Without wasting a minute I asked my friend lets go, but he was tired and feeling sleepy, he was not that excited about going to see the ocean as he had seen it quite many times before. He replied 'we will go in evening..' I abused him with all my favorite gaalis (Abusive words). After listening to my words he got in some action. [All my MCs and BCs worked and he woke up :P] We rushed out of the hotel (actually only I rushed out because my friend is big fan of turtle walk) and here we go.. we are on our way to the calangute beach.

My mind was just not thinking anything else.. even I was not aware of traffic on the way... All I was looking and thinking is about the sea.

Suddenly, Water gurgled and waves were hissing against the shore. I was at the place I always wanted to see. I was standing in front of ocean. what a feeling that was. I was afraid of going near waves, but once I stepped on it everything changed I just loved it. I tasted it to see if it was really salty! Yes it was! It is! I was feeling like standing on the end of the earth. All I could see was water with no end.

First time I waked on waves..

I walked around there for an hour thinking earth is the only planet that is known to have an ocean and today I have seen that. That was awesome. When I was walking the sand was moving underneath my feet, the beautiful shells with different sizes and colors. When I sat on the sand all I could hear was the sound of the 'power of water', so calm and cool breeze was around me. I wondered of coming here everyday, which I know was not possible. So I wanted to get enough of it.

That day was a cloudy day, so we were not able to see the sunset. I was little disappointed. But hoped next day will be a nice bright sunny day, and here we go I was lucky next day, the sun was shining bright :) That evening we went to another beach called Anjuna beach, I found it even more soothing. White foam, golden sand, relaxing, brown rocks, calm and quiet, it was simply majestic.

Dazzling sunlight making the sand sparkle like a thousand tiny jewels, time passed and I was about to see the sunset. I imagine if I could touch it, it would feel like a big sized light bulb. Finally, sun was kissing the edge of the ocean and the wind was blowing lightly. That day for the first time I felt watching sunset is like a great joy and relaxation. I was in heaven. :)

If I did not suppose to work, I believe I would stay there forever. That was just great, while leaving from there I promised myself I'll come back to this place again.

We ended our 4 day Goa trip, and headed toward Kerala, which was also a heaven on earth.

At the end of our trip I realized, the world is full of joy and happiness, all we need to do is see and feel. Nature gives you strength to fight your problems and leave all miss happenings, bad and hard feeling behind. :) Life is awesome, live it... :)